The 12 Best Ways to Live in the Moment

Journal Topics, life, Metaphors in Nature

Living in the moment will lead to a happier life and more enjoyable experiences. Otherwise, one day looking back you’ll realize how much of life you’ve missed.

Here are 12 things you can start doing to better live in the moment and be mindful of all that’s going on around you:

1 – Take a few conscious breaths.

Breathing is something we all do automatically. Thanks to awesome brain functions, we don’t have to worry much about inhaling and exhaling. Stopping to take a few deep breaths will force you to slow down and turn off the auto-pilot for a minute.

2 – Make to-do lists for later.

Anytime an errand crosses your mind, write it down and put the list aside. At the end of the day, go through and complete some of the items on the list, but never think twice about the tasks once they are written down.

3 – Do more of what you enjoy.

Pay attention to the activities that make you smile and forget all of life’s issues. Do more of those things, schedule them into your week, and enjoy.

4 – Take mental photos of gratitude.

When something awesome happens or whenever a person makes you laugh out loud, take a few moments to express how glad you are that this event happened or how happy you are to spend time with that person. No matter how simple it seems, if it lightens your heart, show gratitude for it. Write it down, smile about it, think about it during rough times – but remember and be grateful.

5 – Reflect on the happenings of the day when you lay down at night. 

Think about everything – the good, the bad, the laughs, the cries, the faces you saw, the ones you wanted to see, etc. Reflect on the day as a whole.

6 – Avoid judging others. 

Most often, judgement is a purely negative experience. It traps you in your mind and thoughts and keeps you from living in the moment. Plus, it wastes precious time that could be spent doing something more positive/productive.

7 – Feel everything.

Take a minute to feel. Can you feel your phone in your hand, your butt in a seat, your feet on the floor, and/or the shirt on your skin? Think and focus on the sense of feeling.

8 – Listen to everything. 

Hear all of the words your friend or coworker speaks to you without thinking of responses. Hear every word in a song on the radio. Listen to the birds chirping outside the window and the cars driving by your workplace. Close your eyes and listen.

9 – See all that passes.

What color is your patient wearing? How many people did you pass in the grocery store? What color was the cashier’s eyes? What’s the number on the license plate on the car in front of you at the stoplight? Focus, and see.

10 – Taste with every bite. 

Sometimes we eat our meals so quickly throughout the day that we don’t even savor all the amazing flavors. At your next meal, with each and every bite on your fork, truly taste all the aspects of your meal – the seasoning, the oils, the good and the not-so-good. Pay attention.

11 – Smell all the fragrances in your surrounding world.

Our brains filter out so much of what’s sent to them, thankfully so, but often we miss out on experiencing the awesome smell of a flower, perfume, or pine tree. Take 5 minutes to smell all that’s around your typical area. You might notice a scent you never knew was there.

12 – Smile more often.

Psychologically, smiling can improve your mood, no matter if you are fake smiling or genuinely smiling. Try watching a funny video or looking at silly photos on the internet. Find a way to smile. It will improve your mood and probably make others around you smile, too. A good attitude helps you get through the day as you won’t be wishing for the end so much.


Thank you for reading this post. I hope you try some of the things on this list and begin a life of living in the moment!

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The Top 12 Reasons Why You Should Be Confident in All Situations

life, Texas State Parks, Wildlife

Confidence is easy at times and difficult to find in other moments. Stressful situations, rejection, embarrassment, apprehension, being alone – lots of things can drain any and all confidence we work so hard to muster. Regardless of the scenario, there are 12 major reasons you can be confident no matter what:

1 – They are all sheep.

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It sounds silly, but seriously – everyone else you are facing – they’re all just sheep. Cute, harmless, little fluffy sheep. Don’t let any of these creatures intimidate you because…

2 – You are a wolf.

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And wolves don’t lose sleep over the opinions of sheep, right? You are awesome, tough, unique, and just as capable as anyone else out there in the world. Did someone fail to notice this awesomeness in you? That’s because he/she is a sheep. And you’re a wolf.

3 – Life is short.

Whatever happens – even if it’s the worst possible outcome – life is too short to worry about it. Say to yourself, “Wow, that sucks,” and move on. Because worrying about it won’t add any time to your limited lifespan. Don’t waste much time thinking about the “could have,” “should have,” or “would have,” possibilities. It will only ruin your present situation.

4 – Others are likely going to judge you anyway, regardless of how perfectly you perform. 

It’s unfortunate, but some people are just negative. Don’t let the negativity of others infect your attitude. Just do what works for you, because trying to please others will only end in rejection anyways. It’s better to fail at something you care about than to have to face rejection for something unimportant.

5 – You’re wiser than they are.

Others will be placed in front of you to judge and score you, without even knowing much about you. No one will truly understand who you are and what you’re about from an hour long interview. So know that going into an uncomfortable situation, regardless of the outcome, it has nothing to do with who you are as a person. Awesomeness can’t always be seen at first.

6 – Even if they think the worst, you’ll be fine. 

This ties in with #5. If others think the worst of you after the first encounter, that’s their issue. They didn’t have time to get to know the awesome human inside.

7 – Think of all the good things in your life.

When facing the unknown, think of all the amazing things going on in your life. That way, even if something goes wrong, you’ll have the good things to fall back on. Maybe your kids, your friends, your family, your pet, and your intramural league are all going great. Make a list and keep it with you for stressful times when your confidence starts to fade.

8 – We all have a past.

Having a rough past can drain confidence because no one wants to be judged for what she/he did when she was 18 years old. It helps to know that we all have things in our pasts that we aren’t proud of. It does no good to be ashamed of past mistakes.

9 – You have life experience. 

This goes back to how no one you just met knows all the stuff you’ve had to fight in your past. They can judge all they want, but they have no clue the life experiences you’ve racked up.

10 – Other people are only people, too. 

Everyone has insecurities, everyone has been rejected, and everyone has sucky things going on in their lives. Know that you are not alone in unfortunate events.

11 – Everyone has to start somewhere.

Each doctor was once an undergraduate student struggling to pass Biology, each professional was once a clueless intern, and every person at her job had to deal with the “day one” nerves. It’s okay to be new at things because if people avoided being a newbie, no one would ever become anything great.

12 – At life, nobody knows what the hell is going on.

We can all make plans and map out careers and what not, but in reality – nothing ever goes as planned and no one has all the answers. Never be ashamed or embarrassed that your life is a wreck – everyone’s life is a mess. And those who deny that are lying to themselves.


Confidence will falter, it will be low at times, but try to remember/do these 12 things and you’ll feel a boost.

Thank you for reading, have an amazing day. Stand tall, be confident.

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Tyler State Park – Texas

Top 20 Quotes from ‘A Game of Thrones’ // Arya’s Perspective

Books

Arya Stark from A Game of Thrones by George R.R. Martin is a relatable character who wishes to learn skills of swordsman rather than ballroom dancing. These are the top 20 quotes from the novel, from the chapters of Arya’s perspective:

(I am not affiliated with the author, publisher, etc. I am just a fan of the novels. I own nothing.)

  1. “The wolf pup loved her, even if no one else did.” [Narrator]
  2. “The longer you hide, the sterner the penance.” [Jon]
  3. “Know the men who follow you, and let them know you. Don’t ask your men to die for a stranger.” [Ned]
  4. “You have a wildness in you, child. ‘The wolf blood.’” [Ned]
  5. “Grieve for your friend, but never blame yourself.” [Ned]
  6. “And even the lie was…not without honor.” [Ned]
  7. “When the snows fall and the white winds blow, the lone wolf dies, but the pack survives. Summer is the time for squabbles. In winter, we must protect one another, keep each other warm, share our strengths.” [Ned]
  8. “You may be as different as the sun and the moon, but the same blood flows through both your hearts.” [Ned]
  9. “We have enemies who mean us ill. We cannot fight a war among ourselves.” [Ned]
  10. “She closed her eyes and bit her lip and sent the fear away.” [Narrator]
  11. “The monsters were still there, but the fear was gone.” [Narrator]
  12. A bruise is a lesson, and each lesson makes us better.”[Arya, thinking]
  13. “The cat was an ordinary cat, no more. The others expected a fabulous beast, so that is what they saw.” [Syrio]
  14. “Opening your eyes is all that is needing. The heart lies and the head plays tricks with us, but the eyes see true. Look with your eyes. Hear with your ears. Taste with your mouth. Smell with your nose. Feel with your skin. Then comes the thinking, afterward, and in that way knowing the truth.” [Syrio]
  15. “Are you men or dogs that you would threaten a child?” [Syrio]
  16. “…and you will now be speaking to me with more respect.” [Syrio]
  17. “The man who fears losing has already lost.” [Arya, thinking]
  18. “Never do what they expect.” [Arya, thinking]
  19. “This time the monsters did not frighten her. They seemed almost old friends.” [Narrator]
  20. “…and after that the darkness held no more terrors for her.” [Narrator]

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“The Hell I Overcame” by BAD OMENS

Is it just me?, life, Songs

After listening to words of rejection and failure for choosing to improve my health with help, I’ve started to see myself as weak. 

Time after time, I’m forced to regret my decisions that ultimately saved my life. Apparently only the weakest of souls need help to be healthy. At least that’s what I’ve been told, indirectly, by multiple institutions. 

Am I weak for seeking medical forms of help? Does that make me insane and incapable of protecting others or doing a job properly? I guess it doesn’t matter, because I’ll never get the chance to try.

When feeling down about all this, I found a new song by a band called Bad Omens. And it pushed me to realize that I’m not weak for seeking help. I’m a survivor and I still have a lot of life left to live.

The song is called “The Hell I Overcame” and here are a few of the lines that helped me get back on my feet:

“Did you really think the pain would send me to an early grave? Did you think I couldn’t break these chains after all the hell I overcame?”

“God, please forgive those who doubt me, forgot about me, then throw them down into the flames.”

Instead of letting myself to not feel good enough, not feel capable of achieving something great, or allowing others to decide my fate, this song motivates me to put the pity party in the past and figure out a way to get what I want out of my life.

Maybe I don’t fit the perfect mold of what has historically set the precedent for what I want to be, but that shouldn’t lead me to give up on my dreams. It shouldn’t lead anyone out there from striving to become more.

Never let others or a set of ancient rules tell you who you are. Overcome.

And check out the song: https://youtu.be/Fhetl6tFIlg

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“Did you think I couldn’t break these chains after all the hell I overcame?”

Invaluable Life Advice from Jane Eyre (Part Five)

Books

This is the fifth and final post providing a collection of quotes from Jane Eyre. My hope is to read between the lines and spread the wisdom in these pages crafted by Charolette Brontë in 1847.

Here are the other four parts in case you missed them:

Part One
Part Two
Part Three
Part Four

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1 – Never let pride stand in the way of doing what’s right. 

“I was not heroic enough to purchase liberty at the price of caste.” Narrator (Chapter 3)

Doing the right thing is often difficult because it can come with backlash and judgement from those around us. However, it’s important to remember that facing moments of backlash is nothing compared to the regret that comes with neglecting to do the right thing.

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2 – You are strong enough to handle what the world has dealt you. 

“Yet it would be your duty to bear it, if you could not avoid it. It is weak and silly to say you cannot bear what it is your fate to be required to bear.” Helen Burns (Chapter 6)

“Why was I always suffering, always brow-beaten, always accused, forever condemned? Why could I never please? Why was it useless to try to win anyone’s favor?” Narrator (Chapter 2)

When going through hard times, it can often feel as if the universe is out to get us. Always remember that you are strong enough to face whatever is thrown your way.

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3 – Do not let day to day, petty issues infect your mood.  

“I can so clearly distinguish between the criminal and his crime; I can so sincerely forgive the first while I abhor the last; with this creed, revenge never worries my heart, degradation never too deeply disgusts me, injustice never crushes me too low. I live in calm, looking to the end.” Helen Burns (Chapter 6)

Looking at the big picture in life helps to reduce the significance of the daily stressors that can seem life altering in the moment. Always remember the most important things in life and don’t let anything less get you down.

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4 – Do not let fear get in the way of your goals and dreams. 

“The fear of failure in these points harassed me worse than the physical hardships of my lot; those these were no trifles.” Narrator (Chapter 7)

“It is a very strange sensation to inexperienced youth to feel itself quite alone in the world; cut adrift from every connection, uncertain whether the port to which it is bound can be reached, and prevented by many impediments from returning to that it has quitted. The charm of adventure sweetens that sensation, the glow of pride warms it; but then the throb of fear disturbs it;” Narrator (Chapter 11)

Fear is often the biggest obstacle in the path of reaching our dreams. “What if I fail?” “Will my friends laugh at me?” “Will I be taken seriously?” “Am I good enough?”

Fear is understandable and everyone faces it at some point in life. Yet that feeling of being afraid to fail does not mean you shouldn’t pursue your goals. On the other hand, it probably means you need to go for it. Don’t let fear hold you back, just as Jane continues on her journey is this novel even though she is scared to venture out.

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5 – Don’t try to be like everyone else – humans are flawed.

“Such is the imperfect nature of man – such spots are there on the disk of the clearest planet; and eyes like Miss Scatcherd’s can only see those minute defects, and are blind to the full brightness of the orb.” Narrator (Chapter 7)

“Most things free-born will submit to anything for a salary;” Mr. Rochester (Chapter 14)

The goals others have, the items they crave, and the lifestyle they dream of are all irrelevant. What matters is what you want, what your goals are, and how you strive to reach those goals. Advice from others is great, but you should always remember that everyone else has a different dream in mind. One person’s path to success with look absolutely different than another.

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6 – The heart’s feelings are not easily changed.

“I could not unlove him now, merely because I found that he had ceased to notice me – because I might pass hours in his presence, and he would never once turn his eyes in my direction – because I saw all his attentions appropriated by a great lady, who scorned to touch me with the hem of her robes as she passed – who, if ever her dark and imperious eye fell on me by chance, would withdraw it instantly…” Narrator (Chapter 18)

“There was nothing to cool or banish love in these circumstances, though much to create despair.” Narrator (Chapter 18)

“Blasphemy against nature! Every good, true, vigorous feeling I have, gathers impulsively round him. I know I must conceal my sentiments; I must smother hope; I must remember that he cannot care much for me.” Narrator (Chapter 17)

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When heartbroken or craving someone intensely, feeling angry at yourself is never a good response. The heart is going to want people and things that are not good for you, not right for you, or completely out of your reach. Don’t let yourself be mad at your heart for wanting things it shouldn’t. It’s natural to feel this way, so talk about it, write about it, discuss it with a friend, and grow from it.

Anger will never force your heart to change its desires.

7 – Words are much more painful than “sticks and stones.”

“Better tire my limbs than strain my heart…” Jane to herself (Chapter 25)

“And with that answer, he left me. I would much rather he had knocked me down.” Narrator (Chapter 34)

“My rest might have been blissful enough, only a sadheart broke it.” Narrator (Chapter 28)

“I so dreaded a reply that would crush me with despair. To prolong doubt was to prolong hope.” Narrator (Chapter 36)

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Words can cut deep and wound the soul. We all have scars on our hearts from the harsh words others have spoken. Always be careful what you say to others because a physical wound will heal, but a wound to the mind can last a lifetime.

8 – The mind holds the most beauty.

“Your mind is treasure, and if it were broken it would be my treasure still…” Mr. Rochester to Jane (Chapter 27)

“My very soul demands you…” Mr. Rochester (Chapter 37)

“…all the sunshine I can feel is in her presence.” Mr. Rochester (Chapter 37)

“I have worn it since the day I lost my only treasure…” Mr. Rochester on his bronze scrag (Chapter 37)

“…this obvious absence of passion in his sentiments toward her, that my ever-torturing pain arose.” Narrator (Chapter 18)

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Society is quick to value beauty as a result of the way people look. But the true beauty is found in the soul or the mind; the way a person treats others, the intelligence he/she holds, the quirks that are apparent, the music that she listens to when she’s sad – all of this is what leads to real beauty.

Instead of trying to look more appealing on the outside, we should strive to better our minds because that’s where the true value lies.

9 – Learn from those you admire.  

“…she was qualified to give those who enjoyed the privilege of her converse a taste of far higher things.” Narrator (Chapter 9)

“…she was smart in all she did, and had a remarkable knack of narrative…” Narrator (Chapter 4)

“What a smile! I remember it now, and I know that it was the effluence of fine intellect, of true courage…” Narrator on Helen Burns (Chapter 7)

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When that feeling of deep admiration hits, it must have some reasoning behind it. Why do you admire certain people and not others? Take the time to evaluate the feelings and learn from those you hold in high regards. Though these people are only human, they may possess qualities you wish to gain yourself. We typically learn best from others.

10 – Never lose hope. 

“…I believed in the existence of other and more vivid kinds of goodness, and what I believed in I wished to behold.” Narrator (Chapter 12)

The world can be a terrible place sometimes, but we can’t let the darkness overtake our hopes of finding happiness. No matter what happens, don’t lose your faith in the world and its people. Goodness does exist if only we can learn to look past the dark.

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Thank you for reading this post. I appreciate it and would love to hear comments about what others see in this amazing novel.

Carly Twelve

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Invaluable Life Advice from Jane Eyre (Part Four)

Books

Welcome to Part Four of this five part list of advice from Jane Eyre, written by Charlotte Brontë. Whether you’ve read the book or not, enjoyed it’s story or despised it, I hope to highlight the areas where valuable life lessons can be learned. Check out Part One, Part Two, and Part Three if you missed them.

1 – Never make big decisions in times of high emotion.

“…you must really make an effort to tranquillize your feelings.” St. John (Chapter 33)

“I will hold to the principles received by me when I was sane, and not mad – as I am now.” Jane to herself (Chapter 27)

Take a breather and distract yourself, always, before committing to an action in a moment of extreme emotional highs and lows. Be careful not to make tough promises when you’re happy, send lengthy gut-spilling messages when you’re sad, or quit your job in a massive angry outburst.

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We later regret the decisions made and words spoken in those moments, so it’s best to step away, calm down, and decide how to act when our minds have settled down.

2 – Decipher between what’s desired and what’s necessary.

“That I should like to have it is certain; whether it would be judicious or wise is another question.” St. John (Chapter 32)

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Whether it’s a new car or a new boyfriend, it’s important to consider the necessity  and morale of whatever is desired. Is it right or wrong, will it still be wanted a month later? Think about it before jumping in.

3 – Connection is key.

“And you,” I interrupted, “cannot at all imagine the craving I have for fraternal and sisterly love. I never had a home, I never had brothers and sisters; I must and will have them now.” Jane (Chapter 33)

“…there is no happiness like that of being loved by our fellow-creatures, and feeling that your presence is an addition to their comfort.” Narrator (Chapter 22)Image result for family

At the end of the day, we are human and need love and connection from others. That’s what most of us desire in life whether we admit it or not, and connection is what gives life true meaning.

4 – Do not idolize humans. 

“I could not, in those days, see God for his creature, of whom I had made an idol.” Jane on Mr. Rochester (Chapter 24)

Especially when infatuated with a new interest, it’s easy to place him/her on an impossible pedestal. We also do this with celebrities, parents, teachers, and other people in places of high admiration. It’s great to have role models but important to remember that these people are only human too. They will make mistakes and let us down, and that’s normal. To avoid heartbreak, know they’re human, not gods without imperfections.

Admire those who deserve it, but don’t hold them to inhuman standards.

5 – Forgiving enemies from the past will bring you peace. 

“It is a happy thing that time quells the longings of vengeance, and hushes the promptings of rage and aversion; I had left this woman in bitterness and hate, and I came back to her now with no other emotion than a sort of ruth for her great sufferings, and a strong yearning to forget and forgive all injuries…” Narrator on Mrs. Reed (Chapter 21)

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It’s an amazing experience to feel nothing at the sight of an old face that used to bring pain. Forgive, move on, and over time you will also forget. Peace will come as days go by and new friends come and go. Allow yourself to forgive and heal, and you’ll gain true serenity of mind.

6 – Help others. 

“…no service degrades which can better our race.” St. John (Chapter 30)

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Give a little change to a person on a street corner with a cardboard sign, pick up some trash in the ditch, clean up a mess so another doesn’t have to…the list is endless of tasks we can complete to help others. It should never be seen as degrading and we shouldn’t feel we are “above” doing something because we’re all human, here on this earth, surviving together.

7 – An experience is only as good as your attitude/mood in the moment. 

“I flew through Europe half mad, with disgust, hate, and rage as my companions; now I shall revisit it healed and cleansed…” Mr. Rochester (Chapter 24)

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Vacations, movies, theme parks, weddings, family functions, and any other events are only enjoyed when you have a clear mind. If you go on vacation immediately following a huge fight with your significant other, you likely won’t enjoy that vacation at all.

The good thing about attitude is that we have one hundred percent over our own. So no matter what happened leading up to today, you have the power to tell yourself to suck it up and have a great day.

8 – Forgive yourself, whether others forgive you or not. 

“…let him look higher than his equals for strength to amend, and solace to heal.” Jane Eyre (Chapter 20)

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Asking for forgiveness can be hard, especially if the other person refuses to accept the apology. However, nothing is as hard as forgiving ourselves.

Say it out loud, and say it everyday, “I forgive myself.” Over time, you’ll be able to lighten the burden on your heart.

9 – Keep yourself guarded.

“…I should keep him ignorant that harm to me is possible.” Mr. Rochester (Chapter 20)

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Be vulnerable when you need to vent, but keep those against you ignorant of weakness. Those people don’t deserve to see inside your soul to the beautiful person within.

10 – Never let the difficult times darken your spirit. 

“I will break obstacles to happiness, to goodness…” Mr. Rochester (Chapter 15)Image result for obstacle

Keep a fighter’s motivation and push back when times grow arduous. Don’t let the darkness of others and the world around you infect your spirit. Stand strong and know that dark times are bound to change, and push away those people who only bring you down.Image result for book

Thanks for reading this post, and stay tuned for Part Five.

Carly Twelve ^_^

 

Invaluable Life Advice from Jane Eyre (Part Three)

Books

There’s too much wisdom in this novel to condense it down to one or two single documents, so here is Part Three of the priceless life advice contracted from Charolette Brontë’s Jane Eyre.

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If you missed them, check out Part One and Part Two.

1 – Never let your pride make your decisions for you. 

“Her feelings are concentrated in one – pride; and that needs humbling.” Mr. Rochester (Chapter 24)

“I have not much pride under such circumstances; I would always rather be happy than dignified, and I ran after him…” Narrator on St. John (Chapter 34)

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Pride can be a dangerous trait when it comes to happiness, contentment, and closure. It’s important to know when to swallow the stubbornness of pride and move forward with life.

2 – Trust your gut. 

“…cease to mistrust yourself…” St. John (Chapter 34)

“To have yielded then would have been an error of principle; to have yielded now would have been an error of judgement.” Narrator (Chapter 35)

“…he surrounded me with his arm, almost as if he loved me. I say almost – I knew the difference – for I had felt what it was to be loved…” Narrator (Chapter 35)

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Those gut feelings in moments of pressure are often protective. Sometimes it’s best to trust those feelings instead of overthinking the situation.

3 – Even those we have high respect for are only human.  

“…I felt his imperfection, and took courage. I was with an equal, one with whom I might argue…” Narrator (Chapter 34)

“When I remembered how far I had once been admitted to his confidence, I could hardly comprehend his present frigidity.” Jane on St. John (Chapter 34)

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It’s normal to be nervous or to act differently around those of socially higher status – a professor, boss, doctor, etc. Yet at the end of the day, those people are only human, too. They may deserve and receive our respect, but they should still be treated as fellow humans.

4 – Know your own worth and value. Stand firm in your feelings. 

“A woman who could betray me for such a rival was not worth contending for; she deserved only scorn; less however, than I, who had been her dupe.” Mr. Rochester (Chapter 15)

“…so don’t make him the object of your fine feelings, your raptures, agonies, and so forth. He is not of your order; keep to your caste; and be too self respecting to lavish the love of the whole heart, soul, and strength, where such a gift is not wanted and would be despised.” Narrator (Chapter 17)

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“But I was not jealous, or very rarely – the nature of the pain I suffered could not be explained by that word. Miss Ingram was a mark beneath jealousy; she was too inferior to excite the feeling.” Narrator (Chapter 18)

“…I can live alone, if self-respect and circumstances require me so to do. I need not sell my soul to buy bliss. I have an inward treasure, born with me, which can keep me alive if all extraneous delights should be withheld, or offered only at a price I cannot afford to give.” The gypsy (Mr. Rochester) quoting Jane’s personality (Chapter 19)

“A sneer, however, whether covert or open, had now no longer that power over me it once possessed…” Narrator (Chapter 21)

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“The fact was, I had other things to think about…pains and pleasures so much more acute and exquisite had been exited than any it was in their power to inflict or bestow – that their airs gave me no concern either for good or bad.” Narrator (Chapter 21)

“I’ll promise you anything, sir, that I think I am likely to perform.” Jane Eyre (Chapter 21)

“Jewels for Jane Eyre sounds unnatural and strange; I would rather not have them.” Jane (Chapter 24)

“…and I don’t call you handsome, sir, though I love you most dearly – far too dearly to flatter you. Don’t flatter me.” Jane (Chapter 24)

“…don’t send for the jewels, and don’t crown me with roses; You might as well put a border of gold lace round that plain pocket-handkerchief you have there.” Jane (Chapter 24)

“…I like rudeness a great deal better than flattery. I had rather be a thing than an angel.” Jane (Chapter 24)

“Seek one elsewhere than in me, St. John…” Jane (Chapter 34)

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“…if I bid you do what you thought wrong, there would no light-footed running, no neat-handed alacrity, no lively glance and animated complection. My friend would then turn to me quiet and pale, and would say, ‘No, sir; that is impossible; I cannot do it, because it is wrong,’ and would become immutable as a fixed star. Well, you, too, have power over me, and may injure me…” Mr. Rochester (Chapter 20)

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If any situation or person leads you to question your beliefs and who you are, do not take it lightly. Stand strong in the way that you feel about things and don’t let others question your integrity. Some people deserve our love, and some do not. Some people will help us learn, and others will help us learn who not to be.

Self respect goes a long way in keeping you happy. Don’t let others make you question who you are or the value you know you possess.

5 – Move on when necessary.

“…what necessity is there to dwell on the Past, when the Present is so much surer – the Future so much brighter?” Mr. Rochester (Chapter 27)

“…I must seek another interest in life to replace the one lost…” Jane to herself (Chapter 34)

“…I see the necessity of departure; and it is like looking on the necessity of death.” Jane Eyre (Chapter 23)

“It cannot be too early to commence the task I have to fulfil.” Jane to herself about leaving (Chapter 27)

“He would send for me in the morning; I should be gone.” Jane/Narrator (Chapter 27)

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Moving on and letting go are possibly the most difficult actions throughout our lives. Yet sometimes, it’s the best option for ourselves in order to regain sanity and happiness. Though it may ache and burn the heart, over time it becomes obvious that moving on is the best decision.

6 – Say what’s on your mind and release those feelings from burdening your heart.  

“Reserved people often really need the frank discussion of their sentiments and griefs more than the expansive.” Narrator (Chapter 32)

“…it is fully as much a matter of feeling as of conscience. I must indulge my feelings, I so seldom have had an opportunity of doing so.” Jane (Chapter 33)

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Bottling things up will make a person absolutely insane until finally the thoughts explode in destructive ways. It’s far better to let out the feelings as they trouble you. Holding things in will stress you out, so speak up and release the tension.

7 – Music and Books can solve many problems. 

“…the world book acted as a transient stimulus…” Narrator (Chapter 3)

“I soon forgot storm in music.” Narrator (Chapter 33)

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There aren’t too many stressors that can’t be drowned out by amazing songs and awesome reads. Whether you are in a sad, angry, frustrated, or bored mood, there’s typically a song or novel close by that can ease the mind.

8 – Other people, for whatever reasons, just think differently than you. 

“…for acting in conformity to ideas and principles instilled into them, doubtless, from their childhood…they had reasons for holding them such as I could not fathom.” Narrator on Miss Ingram marrying Mr. Rochester for pride and money (Chapter 18)

“…convinced me that there must be arguments against its general adoption of which I was quite ignorant, otherwise I felt sure all the world would act as I wished to act.” Narrator (Chapter 18)Image result for different

Sometimes it depends on how you’re raised, other times it’s a result of stressful events, and often it’s a result of society’s influence – the point is, right or wrong, we all have our own opinions on the world and how it should be. You can argue for years with someone with differing views, but it’s often a complete waste of time.

Respect and understand that others will always have different ways of thinking. We will never agree on everything. Take it for what it is, respect your own beliefs, and you will be at peace.

9 – Enjoy natural beauties of the world. 

“Turn back; on so lovely a night it is a shame to sit in the house; and surely no one can wish to go to bed while sunset is thus at meeting with moonrise.” Mr. Rochester (Chapter 23)

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Those cloudless moonlit nights are a simple beauty of nature meant to be enjoyed by us all. We so frequently ignore and disregard the simple wonder that the skies and earth provide us with. Take the time to admire the exquisite earth we take for granted.

10 – Sometimes it’s best to keep things to yourself.

“It is far better to endure patiently a smart which nobody feels but yourself, than to commit a hasty action whose evil consequences will extend to all connected with you.” Helen Burns (Chapter 6)

“Silence composes the nerves.” Narrator (Chapter 15)

“You are no talking fool; say nothing about it.” Mr. Rochester (Chapter 15)

It is my way – it was always my way by instinct – ever to meet the brief with brevity, the direct with plainness.” Narrator (Chapter 29)Image result for shh

It’s good to let things out if they’re eating at you, but always be wise in letting the world see your every thought and plan. We live in a world today that is quick to scream and shout opinions. It can feel pretty good to be that one person in the background, observing and keeping the thoughts inside.

Living in a loud world, many times it’s best to enjoy silent moments. The loudness of society will never listen to wisdom anyway, so share your thoughts with those who will listen, instead of the boisterous voices that only seek attention.

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That’s ten more pieces of valuable advice I’ve heard in the pages of Jane Eyre. I hope you enjoyed this post and thank you ever so much for reading it.

Carly Twelve ^_^