Demons – Friends or Foes?

Is it just me?, life, Poems

The demons are nothing if not persistent. They’re always with me…lurking in the background of shadows and forgotten regrets. Even in the most glorious of days, they never truly go away. 

Mixed feelings arise always. The demons have brought excruciating pain, so I want them to go away. Yet, the demons have always been around, there beside me when no other soul would walk along my chosen path.

Enemies…companions…is it possible to be both? Those demons are all I have ever known. From an age too young to know, they were there. They waited patiently for me to grow and be exposed to the darker side of the world around me.

The demons saw an opportunity to create a monster. They amplified the imperfect scenes of my childhood. They made those moments stick and seethe in my soul as I grew older. They planted the seed of hate watched it fester and flourish until I began to know no other emotion.

Then a sickness started to swirl deep in my bones. It started small. But the demons, they were patient and persistent. They knew this small illness would develop rapidly into a lifelong turmoil. An eternal war within my body.

They sat there, watching. Silent. Smiling, as my suffering expanded with each failure to stop the sickness.

They were proud. They lead me to destruction while watching nearby. Never too far away. Never letting me leave their line of sight.

They have haunted me every moment of my existence. Losing them…pushing them away…it’s almost the equivalent of severing a portion of my own soul. The demons are me. I am them. I created them. What purpose do they serve other than feeding an addiction I developed as a young girl?

I want to destroy them. How do I destroy them without destroying myself?

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This is Why I am Writing – Please Respond

Is it just me?, life

I write for self and sanity. I journal each day, religiously, with a pen and paper. It’s private, and no other soul will ever be allowed to touch my pages as long as I am living. 

So why the sudden platform? Why did I create a blog and start throwing out daily thoughts for the public to read?

Being alone is not always ideal. I’ve been alone most of my life in a journey of a vicious cycle, recovery, and depression. From time to time, it’s nice to hear that someone else is struggling with the same issues I am. It’s a warm feeling to know that others exist out in the world who have fought similar battles. 

I would never wish suffering upon others just to feel I have companions, but I know that I’m not the only person on earth with problems. It’s comforting to find people who know what it’s like to battle for our own souls. To work endlessly to end a disorder that’s been lingering for years. 

That’s why I’m writing. If there’s anyone out there who feels the same way I do, I want to meet and connect. I want to talk and have conversations and feel that I’ve found a friend for these journeys of life. 

We are not alone. I am not alone. You are not alone. We live in this modern society of connecting across country lines and beyond the normal boundaries, thanks to the internet and social media. We no longer have to feel that we are the only person battling these disparities.

I am writing to reach out. I want to hear stories from others – whether happy or grim. I want to hear, I want to read, I want to connect.

Please – if there’s anyone out there willing to talk and share, I’m all ears.

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This is a Safe Place to Speak

This is Why Pets are Better Than Friends

Pets

Loneliness can be a harmful feeling for anyone across all walks of life. Most of the time when loneliness hits, the first thought is that it might be a good idea to go out and meet new people or form new friendships. However, sometimes the best kind of new friend isn’t human at all.

When craving companionship, instead of hanging around local places to pick up new acquaintances, head out to the local animal shelter and consider adopting a furry friend to curve the aches of feeling alone.    

Here are six reasons why pets are better than friends.

1 – With a pet, you’ll never have any drama between the two of you.

Unless you consider the potential destruction of furniture and other household items “drama” you aren’t likely to experience any from your pet. These beautiful creatures live each day like it’s their only day to exist. They aren’t going to dwell on the past or care what happened just five minutes ago. They couldn’t care less whose boyfriend you stole last year or that you were the only family member to not chip in for your father’s birthday gift. None of the petty situations in life matter to your pets, creating a drama free environment for you to live in.

2 – Your pet will never leave you.

It can be extremely painful to lose a friend when he/she leaves town or just stops communicating all together. A pet will never do this because a) it’s probably trapped in a fence or house, but also because b) it loves its owner unconditionally. It relies on the caregiver for companionship, food, and water and will be eternally grateful for these selfless services. It will never take off to another state for a job opportunity, clean out its closet to go take care of its sick relative, or grow tired of you and leave without notice. After adopting a pet, the worry that the new trusty companion might leave will never be an issue. It will be faithful and loyal until the very end.

3 – Your pet absolutely depends on you.

The feeling of not being needed by our friends can cause serious self-worth, value, and esteem issues. A pet, however, will forever be alive due to the loving hands of its owner. It will need you from day one until your time together comes to a close. You are the most important person on the planet to your furry friends. Being valued can make anyone feel needed and necessary.  

4 – Your pet will always be excited to see you.

It’s the best part of the work day when you’re free to go home and excite the senses of your eager pet. It will run to the door to greet you with a wagging tail, meowing voice, or a purring belly. Whether you are gone two minutes or two days, you can look forward to that pure, genuine excitement from your pet after being without you for any length of time. Wouldn’t it be nice to know that no matter how bad the work day may be, there will be an ecstatic little furball awaiting your homecoming with kisses and sweetness?

5 – You’re free to speak your mind without fear of judgement when venting to your pet.

Most often when we vent, we aren’t seeking advice or opinions, we just need someone to listen. Your secrets and views about the world will always be safe within the mind of your furry companion. It won’t judge you for feeling angry, sad, or even extremely happy. It will sit there with its sensitive ears and take in every single word you say to it. Who better to spill your darkest secrets to?

6 – Pets are not materialistic and will never ask for too much.

Friends might only hang around as long as you are the one paying for events. They might not want to hang out with you at all if you drive a rusty car, use a flip phone from 2008, or live in a sketchy apartment. Or your friends might just constantly judge your fashion styles and weird hobbies.

You know who will never even care about any of that stuff? Your pet. A pet can have entertainment for days with a cereal box it pulled out of the trash can. That’s the true meaning of “making the most of what you have.”

Feed the pets, give them water, take them to receive annual shots, and spend some time with them – that’s about it. They’re not going to ask for a brand new car, for a fancy dinner, for a cake on their birthdays (of course, you can if you prefer to celebrate the special occasion), and most of their toys can be made from random, cheap items around the house. No complaints, no snarky remarks, just you and your pet living each day with what you have.

If loneliness is beating down on you each night, stay out of the bars, clubs, and online dating sites. Check out the local animal shelter, save a life, and enjoy all the awesome benefits that come with taking care of an amazing animal. That pesky loneliness will go away and you will secure a lifelong, loyal companion.

 

 

References:

Jacobs Bao, K. and Schreer, G. (2016) Pets and Happiness: Examining the Association  

Between Pet Ownership and Wellbeing, Anthrzoös, 29:2, 283-296, DOI: 10.1080/08927936.2016.1152721 <http://dx.doi.org/10.1080/08927936.2016.1152721>